I'm on Vacation

Hey Readers,

Whassup? I've been away on vacation for a week, and blogging just isn't the first thing I think of doing while away. Oh don't worry, I've been taking lots of travel notes, tons o'pictures, and will have some posts done as soon as I get home. If I get home. Seems my flights have been getting cancelled left and right. Fingers crossed, I'll be home tomorrow.

I just had to do this one post. Last night the cuz and I were watching TV, flipping channels and whatnot. She stopped on Dog the Bounty Hunter. I'd never seen it before, mostly because I take one look at the guy and want to puke. I mean, the bleached mullet, the deep tan, the outfits! Anyway, I ended up sitting there with "She Who Shall Remain Nameless to protect her from people who agree with me", and we watched about four episodes.

I couldn't get over it. First of all, I didn't really know what a bounty hunter was, and I'm still not sure, even though SWSRN explained it to me. They work with the cops, or work on their own? They need a search warrant? They can just bust in to anyplace? Anyway.

This show cannot be for real. Those outfits, for one. The wife looks like Anna Nicole Smith squashed down by an anvil or something. You expect me to believe she actually goes out on "the job" wearing a tank top, short shorts, and heels??? She inflates her boobs right before they jump in their cruiser. Required for the uniform: Make sure you wear sunglasses, and everyone wear black. And that hair. Oh god, that hair. I asked SWSRN if this was current, or was it taped in 1985. She said it was current. I don't believe it.

And here comes the kicker. Deep breath. SWSRN thinks he's hot. I'm not kidding! I almost had a stroke when she told me. I told her, "I thought we were connected. I thought we shared values, the same..." I couldn't finish my sentence. I just had to accept that perhaps she and I do not share the same taste in men. First word she thinks of when I say, "Brad Pitt"? Gross. First word I think of? Hot. First word I think of when I look at Dog the Bounty Hunter? Blaughhhhh! (vomit sound)

I had to check at one point. He had on this outfit not to be believed. It was a black and grey matching button down shirt and pants out of the Miami Vice era, and the shirt was unbuttoned to mid-chest. I asked, jokingly, "Do you think he's hot now?" And she said yes!

And he thinks he's so macho, and she has those talon nails, and the whole family is involved, and they pray together before every bust. Wow. Wow. Hey, I know some people might find it strange that I have a crush on Keith Morrison, but at least when he talks you there's an air of mystery surrounding him. With these clowns, they let all their shit hang out, and it ain't pretty.

I think they should have Dog the Bounty Hunter viewings at high schools around the country. That would scare me straight for sure. Ugghhh! (shudder)